“One of the greatest things a father can do for his children is to love their mother.” –Howard W. Hunter
In the last part of this series I left to go reflect. As I write this, it has not even been a month since I lost my dad (as I post and polish it up, it has been just over a year). As you can imagine, I have been reflecting a lot. Reflecting on my dad, on my life. Reflecting on what he did for me and our family. And, for those around us – ones we called friends, our extended family, as well as people unknown, strangers.
In short, I have been going through the grieving process. My grieving process; crying, laughing, sleeping, eating, blaming, asking, yelling, screaming, denying, accepting, honoring, and mourning. You name it, I seem to be doing it.
Why is that? Because he was a good dad, much more than a father. Any man with working parts can be a father but not every father can be a dad. Mine, he was a dad – the dad of dads. I told my mom it would be so much easier if he was a jerk. A deadbeat dad that no one liked. But, he was a good dad, and for that I am glad. What he gave to me in my life is a priceless gift, far outweighing the temporary sadness of loss.
So what did he give? Words cannot communicate that exactly but I will do my best and share what I can. But know that perhaps the greatest gift was his permission and support to just be me.
At this point I must interject to confirm a very important point. Much is being said about my dad, of course because he is the deceased, however my mom is as much to praise. They were a parental unit, a partnership. A team, providing a win for us all. Married for nearly fifty seven years. That is a gift in itself to all who witnessed.
After all, if that were all I received would that be enough for a lifetime? The example, the lesson, the living how to manual of a successful married life with happy, healthy children? Most definitely, but there’s so much more. As I have wound down a different path on this than I intended. I will just focus on the basics I pondered at the close of the previous part and save the rest for next time.
So what did my father give to me, to us? He did what the father does in the traditional sense, he provided food, clothing, shelter, protection, foundation, and security. In short, he took care of his family. We had all we needed and most of what we wanted. We were happy and healthy. We were sad and mad. We were funny and angry. We were perfectly imperfect!
And yet, he did so much more…
Talk Soon,
Kevin W @LEAP272
Owner-Operator
You have to leap if you want to live
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